Reimagining Life With a Favorite Things List

One evening, my hubby asked if I would share my ten favorite things list with him. He asked me not to include “given” items like him, God, or Family but instead include specific items unique to me. I saw that this would spark a more in-depth conversation between us. Just like the Grinch, my heart grew three sizes right then with a love surge, and I wanted his items, too! We planned to share the next night over dinner. It was so fun to write my favorite things, but I didn’t realize the lasting benefit it would have. Who knew that we could begin reimagining our lives with a Favorite Things List? 

The Great Reveal

Just thinking about my faves was energizing as I dug down through the banal and focused on the positive things in my life that bring me joy. It made me feel so grateful.

The next night came, and I was so excited to have our conversation. True to our personalities, I brought my Word document entitled “Top Ten Favorites Things List,” preserved on the cloud. Bobby had his whole list right there in his head. If I quizzed him today, I would bet my next paycheck that he could recite each item. In order. Am I jelly of his brain? Why yes. Yes, I am. 🙂

Sharing Our Favorite Things List Brought Us Closer

When we were reviewing the lists, some favorites were well known to us. For instance, I wrote, “the sound of the seagulls and the crashing waves at the beach.” I appreciate a lot of things about the beach, but Bobby knows what my favorite thing is.  

As soon as we reach our vacation room, no matter the time and before he does anything else, he opens the balcony door wide for me. He lets the sound of the beach inside the room. And as he does, he looks at me and smiles because he knows that to me, it’s the best part.

I love that he knows.

He smiled knowingly at “when someone reacts in a visceral way to food that I cook.” We both had “Sacred Saturdays” on our list. I’m not surprised.

But he paused when he read one item. I wrote “every rehearsal with ‘A Pickup Full of Dummies’.” 

You might wonder about the pickup. And the dummies.

We were recording songs together with some friends. I’m a singer, and Bobby plays electric guitar. As a gift to Bobby, I asked some friends to join us to record two songs for him as a gift. I had only ever sung in open mics, and those rehearsals before recording were some of my best times!

After recording, we all hit some cool places I had never been. Think of those online lists you’ve seen called “Cool Places To Do In (insert your city name).” One of the stops was a non-profit surplus building supplies store. I saw it described as the place where home supplies and other oddities go when they die.

As we walked through the parking lot, we saw a pickup with its bed filled to the top with dummies (ahem) mannequins. Next to the truck stood a beguiling man. His personality shone brighter than his bleach-blond hair, neon orange jacket, and paint-spattered – well, everything. He warmly agreed to autograph and selfie requests. My friends shared that his name is Randy, and he is a famous local artist. Who knew? Not me. I didn’t know. 🙄 I never did work up the nerve to ask Randy what he was going to do with those dummies.

He gestured us over, asked for my phone, and took our selfie. I decided that this picture was perfect for our “album cover photo.” And, our “band” was thus deemed “Pickup Full of Dummies.” Look for the album in stores. We’re streaming everywhere. Not.

Sharing Our Favorite Things List Revealed a Better Plan for the Future

We know each other well. We started dating in 1981, and we talk. A lot. But this list revealed nuances to my husband about me that he didn’t know. Heck, it told me stuff about me that I didn’t know about me.

When Bobby read about my joy in rehearsing, he paused for a minute, then suggested that I consider working this kind of activity more into my life. It seems like a small thing, but time is limited, so adding more things that bring you joy usually deletes things that don’t. So, instant upgrade.

The beach item continues to spur conversations concerning possible future living locales.

Big. Big. BIG.

What About You, Friend?

If you’ve gotten to this point in the article, you’ve been very patient reading about our Favorite Things List and dreams for the future. But what about yours and your partner’s?

My advice is to try this exercise.

It’s fun, I promise! It’ll mean a lot to the person you love and bring you closer together. And maybe you’ll learn things that will make you think differently, change direction or create a new plan.

Big. Big. BIG. But, for you.

One more piece of advice. 

I’ve been talking a bunch about adding to and deleting things from your life. But that doesn’t mean that the truth needs to go out the window. You may not have my beliefs, and that’s OK. You’re welcome here, and I hope I’m welcome with you. But here’s some essential advice for your consideration. I don’t know who wrote it, but I believe it.

“You can eat all the kale, buy all the things, lift all the weights, take all the trips, trash all that doesn’t spark joy, wash your face and hustle like mad. But, if you don’t rest your soul in Jesus you will never find peace and purpose.”

I would sure love to see your Favorite Things List and any dreams it sparks in the comments!

A post worth reading:

The Generous Husband |Before You’re Too Old