• Relationships Take Work

    Sacred Saturdays

    I attended a wedding in which the pastor encouraged the bride and groom to get their PhD Degree in the other. It struck me immediately that Bobby and I have this kind of intimacy, and that it has significantly contributed to our happiness. I think the benefits are: We are more understanding and patient with each other’s weaknesses and see and appreciate each other’s strengths. We know the buttons NOT to push which reduces our interpersonal conflict. It is fun and relaxing to have our best friend right in our own home. Being known by someone is good for our health. No, really! Sex is much more likely to happen…

  • Relationships Take Work

    Chasing the Dodgers: Handling Conflict When You’re Different

    Conflict. Ugh. Just the sound of that word makes us cringe, right? But know this. If you can learn how to manage it well, conflict will help your relationship. Yes, make it better because both unaddressed issues and bloody battles are death to your relationship. One might just take longer to make it die than the other. So, let’s figure this out. First, there are really two kinds of people when it comes to conflict: Chasers and Dodgers. Both have good points when it comes to conflict, but both have the capacity to really screw it up, too. It’s important to identify who you both are so the road can…

  • Relationships Take Work

    I Don’t Speak Spanish: How To Speak Love in the Way They Hear It

    I spent much of my time walking the hallways of Big Beaver Falls High School trying to avoid my teacher, Mr. Evans.  “Senor” Evans was a perfectly nice man.  But, he was my Spanish teacher, and anytime he would see one of his students in the hallway, he would try to talk to us in Spanish.  And well, the only thing I knew how to say in Spanish was “No hablo Espanol.” (I don’t speak Spanish.)Have you ever had that same feeling in your relationships? I read a great book by Gary Chapman called “The Five Love Languages.”   Dr. Chapman teaches that every person has a love language. And if…