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STOPPP
One of my favorite speakers, Jeff Henderson, asked this question recently: “Why did Jesus weep when Lazarus died when he knew he would raise him from the dead?” Now, you might not believe in Jesus or know who Lazarus is, but it’s a fascinating story! And, there is relationship advice here. Let me tell you. It’s so so good. There are two guys named Lazarus in the Bible; this one is Lazarus of Bethany. He was brother to Mary and Martha, and the three siblings were very close friends of Jesus. Lazarus got really sick, and the sisters sent word to Jesus that he needed to get there pronto to…
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Sacred Saturdays
I attended a wedding in which the pastor encouraged the bride and groom to get their PhD Degree in the other. It struck me immediately that Bobby and I have this kind of intimacy, and that it has significantly contributed to our happiness. I think the benefits are: We are more understanding and patient with each other’s weaknesses and see and appreciate each other’s strengths. We know the buttons NOT to push which reduces our interpersonal conflict. It is fun and relaxing to have our best friend right in our own home. Being known by someone is good for our health. No, really! Sex is much more likely to happen…
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Chasing the Dodgers: Handling Conflict When You’re Different
Conflict. Ugh. Just the sound of that word makes us cringe, right? But know this. If you can learn how to manage it well, conflict will help your relationship. Yes, make it better because both unaddressed issues and bloody battles are death to your relationship. One might just take longer to make it die than the other. So, let’s figure this out. First, there are really two kinds of people when it comes to conflict: Chasers and Dodgers. Both have good points when it comes to conflict, but both have the capacity to really screw it up, too. It’s important to identify who you both are so the road can…
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Flying Underwear: Is Your Issue Worth Fighting About?
Conflict in any relationship is inevitable and can even be healthy. But it’s only healthy if addressed well. Otherwise, conflict can lead to brutal fighting. Or even worse, distance in the relationship and a cold, cold chill. I have experienced both in relationships, and it’s. not. good. This article is the first of a three-part series. I think we first have to think through when we do indeed need to address something. Then, we’ll talk about extending grace and healthy ways to address issues. Not everything is something you should be willing to “die on the hill for.” Have you heard this saying? It’s a war metaphor. It means that…