• Relationship Advice,  Relationship Advice for Men

    Uncommon Romance

    I love romantic books and movies — I’m the Hey Get A Room girl, right? My husband has offered romantic gestures, even grand ones, in the traditional ways: flowers, expensive dinners, candlelight, and candy. Those things are lovely. I enjoy them immensely. But, other men have offered me many of those same gestures. (Obviously, before The One came along.)  Those should be part of the repertoire if you’re doing dating right. I expound in Classic Rules For Dating In The Modern World. But, men and women who want to earn their Advanced Certification in Romance? Keep doing that stuff. But add those things that show that you get them. Know…

  • Communication in Marriage,  Relationship Advice

    Like a Bowling Ball

    Did you know that race cars are like bowling balls? Yeah, me neither. At least not until my race car driver husband explained it to me one day early on in our race career. I trusted him on that, and well, it turned out OK. Trusting one’s life partner is just as important as counting on one’s racing partner. Getting married triggers significant shifts in your world. Now, instead of being the sole master of your universe, you’re sharing that space with your soul mate. The two of you must learn how to navigate life as a team and figure out ways to make strong decisions together. And when time…

  • Relationship Advice

    Not Dead Yet

    This is the beginning of my last year in my 50s. One look in the mirror tells me I’m not 18 anymore, but there are better ways to measure our lives. I’m gonna make this opportunity count. I’m not dead yet. Every decade has had its share of trials, but not without a side of JOY. This one is no exception. This is the decade I took pride down to the mat. I’ve always described myself as a perfectionist. I told myself and others that I didn’t want to do something unless I could “do it with excellence.” You know what they say about humble brag…actually is that a thing…

  • Relationship Advice

    How To Create Emotional Safety in Your Relationship

    My husband is a championship-level professional drag racer and licensed in three classes. Here’s a picture of his current ride, a Nostalgia Front Engine “slingshot” Dragster.   These race cars push three and a half g’s when they leave the starting line, and push him hard into the seat! They’re so fast that he needs a parachute to stop them. When the parachute blossoms, it causes three and a half g’s and throws his body forward. This force is one reason why very tight seatbelts are necessary. The Science of Parachutes Just like you feel resistance when walking through a pool filled with water, a similar effect can be felt…